It seems important to say a little about sexuality since people often confuse sexuality, gender expression, and biology. In case you weren't aware of it, being TransGendered (TG) doesn't necessarily imply a certain sexuality. There are TG people that are heterosexual, bisexual, monosexual (homosexual or lesbian), neither (asexual), and none or all of the above (human-sexual comes to mind). The same can be said for non-TG people; there is the full range. In fact, if you haven't read my Thoughts on Gender page, you may wish to do so for a more detailed description of this concept.
So why do some heterosexual (or bi-sexual) TG people choose to have a 'home' in the 'Gay' community? My guess is it's because they/we are most accepted here. The gay and lesbian community has had to face, and still faces, the prejudice that people show over something that hurts no one. That is between consenting adults. That is no different than the freedom to express religious views; or perhaps not any different than what race you are born with. Does all of the gay community accept TG people? No. Does all of the TG community accept gay people? No. That's too bad... we face a lot of the same prejudices. While I honor the right for people to believe as they want-- as long as it doesn't hurt others-- I have hope that all the people on this Earth can learn to accept and honor the diversity that makes life so interesting.
So where am I on the sexuality scale? Well, a girl's gotta' have some secrets... let's say that, ultimately, my goal is to be attracted to the whole person. The body matters... it is, though, only one part of what matters. The mind and soul matter greatly; I try to consider the whole person.
[Update from Halloween timeframe in 2007, the first update in over 8 years to this page:]
As you may have noticed from my Wedding Picture Page, I'm married (yay! :). I'm married to a wonderful woman, one who supports me; in my crossdressing, and in general. I am a Cross-Dresser (CD), and gave her full disclosure on my being a CD up-front. So my wife entered our marriage w/full disclosure and consent, and she supports my sexuality, and being sexual with her while crossdressed.
In fact, I think a lot of CD's don't admit the sexual component of crossdressing. I will say unequivocally: Sexuality is a component of my crossdressing; it is one of the reasons I crossdress. Period. I get a sexual enjoyment, at least sometimes, from being dressed. This shouldn't make me ashamed (and it no longer does... well, or at least not as much :-}). It doesn't make me icky or prurient. It makes me different (than the 'norm', whatever that is). So if your crossdressing has a sexual component to it... well, welcome to the club! :)
If you want to read a great book about a spouse's thoughts on sexuality (and lots of other great thoughts on crossdressing), please visit the website for My Husband Betty (opens a new window) and buy the book from Helen Boyd, the (nome de plume of the) author.
Well, I hope you've had a chance-- and the interest-- to hear my thoughts on sexuality (and other topics). Are you ready to return to Kim's Home Page?
This page last updated on 02 November, 2007.
©1964-2007 Kim McNelis. All Rights Reserved (No images, text, etc. may be copied w/out Kim's consent. Thank you).